Historical

ONCE WE WERE ZERO, NO WE ARE BUCKETEERS.

It felt like it was only Yesterday since the discovery of The Bucket,

 

but the history of The Bucket started way way back.

 

10.000 Years ago to be exact. in 10.000 BB (Before Bucket) the Indian halfgod Bala looked at the universe,

which was completely black, except for his greatness himself, who had a little night lamp. (it was told so, because otherwise, how the hell

could he see what he was doing?) above Bala's head was also a little roof, made from red stones. (this was significant for the upcoming story)

 

And Bala looked into the devestating darkness and said: "I shall create what must, and good from it shall come."

 

On day one, Bala created a bucket. Not just any bucket, but the bucketiest bucket of them all, the Metal Bucket. and he saw

it was good and that he had worked enough for that day (it took him about One Bucket and 24 Bricks) and went to rest.

 

on the second day, Bala understood the importance of leverage and said "Let there be a handle on the bucket".

And so there was. And bala saw it was good, and after looking at the iron bucket, now with a handle he came to rest.

 

on day three he felt that something was still missing, and became mad. In his raging fury, waving around his arms (like a 4 year old who didn't get the Android tablet he hoped for but received an infirior iPad where it was too hard to sync his illegally downloaded

music) he hit the stone roof above his head and a rain of red bricks fell upon him. after he got up, he noticed that a few

bricks fell into the iron bucket. He saw the amazing beauty of this object, and spoke the words: "I'll act like this was on purpose,

who will know how this shit happened anyway" and saw that what had had created: The perfection of a billion stars, the symbol of hope,

and a damn sexy looking piece of combined material.

 

he said to himself: "I shall call this creation The Bucket, and everyone who will stumble upon it will have to pronounce The Bucket with a capital T and capital B or shall be punished to death by bricks! And yes, I can see your spoken words, I ate a lot of carrots"

 

after this amazing adventure, he went to enjoy a good night's rest (after desinfecting the head wound from the fallen roof with a good bottle of whiskey like they do in the movies) and was again fullfilled with his own greatness.

 

on day four he woke up and created the light, the earth, plants animals and some other shit. And he looked upon it and said: "fuck this shit, i'm going for a few beers" And we never saw or heard from him again. All we remember is that he was a giver, and he gave... But The Bucket went missing, and it would be long before we heard from it again.

 

Bala vanished into the nothing, and life as we know it started to exist. The humans, lost in a world without a leading figure,

creating some made up religions, and being mad at other people who also created make up religions and then declared war agaist the other idiots, and then killing each other over these other religions... (Idiots, right?) The humans wandered around our world, lost, angry, sad and lonely.

 

It was on The Bucket Day, the 23th july 2015 that the saving of mankind was discovered by accident by The Pelgrims.

They understood the importance of The Bucket, understood what they had discovered. So they did the only right thing to do:

 

Bring the people to The Bucket and The Bucket to the people.

 

more coming soon, because Pelgrim Xavier needs to write the rest of history.

 

 

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